30TH

Jojo I made it!! (Jojo is my sister) yes I finished the 100km walk/run challenge that I joined, it was really hard this last week because I haven't been feeling too good health wise all the same I pushed myself and completed it. I have lost a little weight in the process which is AWESOME.
       Completing this month's challenge really made me believe in myself, I must confess I had lost a little self confidence.  God bless the amazing women who came up with this challenge, Lord knows I needed this. I'm not going to stop walking/running just because the challenge is ending today. I have come to love it.
       

WEB OF LIES

For the past two days I have been thinking about why grownups lie. I said grown because I understand when a child lies, he or she is afraid of being punished, but when a grown ass human lie all the time, make up stories, it baffles me. I know people like this are called pathological liars and I think it's a mental disorder but common!!! when is it too much? I have been a victim, victim in the sense that I have had to question everything I ever heard this person say, I am extremely shocked.
    I'm not saying that I don't lie, I do but it's either I'm joking or the person isn't worth the truth. My father used to say that once you lie, you need to tell another lie to cover the first lie and you need another lie to cover the second one. It's an endless web.
 
      "O what a tangle web we weave when we first practice to deceive"
       Walter Scott

If I am straight with someone I expect the same thing, now trust is gone and the friendship is over for me.
I can't stand being lied to over and over and over and over. It's exhausting.
I just can't again.

AMOUR

I love love. I'm a lover of beautiful things especially words, I loooooove words. So when I saw this on instagram I just had to share it here.

This is so beautiful, greatness shouldn't be rushed.

SEPTEMBER

I Joined a group of amazing women to do a September fitness challenge, It's running/walking. The plan is to track how many kilometres you walk/run daily and report to the group weekly, with pictorial evidence. The goal is to get 100km covered before the last day of the month and it comes with a medal also.
       I decided to join this challenge for personal reasons not because of the medal upon completion. I had to get my mind in a right place, it had gotten so messed up last month because of the regret, rejection, anger, shame and guilt I felt. One would think that in my late twenties I would be smarter but life didn't come with an instruction manual, and mistakes will always be a major part of living and growth. Starting this challenge was hard, before now I disliked running/walking, but I knew this was something that I had to do, so I managed to walk for 5km on the first day, and it was refreshing not only did I feel good, I felt the burden lifting.

       After the first day it only got better, let's just say that I am super proud of myself for joining this challenge, it has been therapeutic and I am walking/running for distance I never thought I could. The high I get every time I get back is amazing, it's way better than the feeling of any alcoholic drink (I know this because I drank a whole lot last month to feel better). Running just does something extraordinary to my heart and in a good way, this is something I would love to get addicted too. Another exciting thing happened I found a taekwondo studio on my street, before I found out that running/walking felt this good, martial arts was one of the loves of my life, I used to fight TKD way back and I can't wait to join and start again. It's going to be a good month.
          Edwina fixer votre couronne, vous êtes génial. 

BURNT BRIDGES

 I got introduced to someone recently who needs my help to get stuff. In the midst of our ongoing communication I decided to look at her profile picture to put a face to the name, boom!! she turned out to be someone that I know.
          We go through life burning bridges, treating people badly, ignoring people, cutting people off because in our minds "they have nothing to offer", having zero tolerance for people instead of being patient and communicating properly.
I never thought in a million years that our paths would cross, this person is a public figure, someone who I used to admire a lot till I meet her, and she was extremely rude and mean to me. The memory of the things she said to me got stuck in my head and I lost all admiration for her that day. Fast-forward to 2015, I'm pretty sure that she has no idea who I am, to her I'm a stranger.
     
We need to use our God-given talents, wealth and position carefully especially when dealing with people we see as "strangers" we might never know who we will meet and need help from in this game called life. I am going to help her do everything, that she needs me to help her with, not because I can't say no but because I'm trying to be a better person, more forgiving, and also a better communicator. Some times people do things unintentionally not meaning to cause hurt and pain, and end up causing it. I have also learned that treating people kindly, with respect and diplomacy is way better than making them feel worthless and irrelevant.
                     "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." -Maya Angelou
      So when we make people feel worthless and irrelevant it gets stuck.
       So help me God.

FOREVER IN MY HEART

I had an amazing piece to write, I wanted the first thing I posted this month to be wow!! but... instead I'm going to post a song called Jealous by Labrinth. I lost my father six years ago this month, 5th to be precise I thought I would have gotten over it by now. I wish I had a few months with him to get myself ready, I wasn't ready to let him to go. So this song is for you Daddy, I am jealous that you are happy without me, all I do is cry behind this smile.

In loving memory of my father.